I'm nerdy. I like nerd stuff. I also like good music. I also like boobies. I also like pizza. I like pizza more than boobies. Deal with it.

Yellowcard - Ten (+ lyrics and HQ/HD Audio) [New Album Summer 2012] - YouTube

I’m so sorry for you. No parent should have to go through this.

Rare footage of 18/19 year old emo/hardxcore me #tbt #myspacedays #old

Rare footage of 18/19 year old emo/hardxcore me #tbt #myspacedays #old

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I hate computers. I hate computers. I hate computers. I hate computers.

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At this point I’m really just making my own life difficult.

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I feel blue. These days I’m finding it hard to sleep. For the first time since my childhood I’m having bad dreams. This one dream I’m in a hallway with doors. Pale green room. A door in front and one behind. The width of the hall is about 5 maybe 6 feet and there are 3 doors on each side. 8 doors in total. Every door I go into it leads me to the same hallway. Every time I try to move forward or find a way out I find myself at the same hallway until I lose energy and pass out. Is this what my life will be? Make an effort to move forward only to return to square one? I don’t want to be stuck anymore. I want to move forward.

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You know, you do your best to become a proper human being, but everyone calls you names like pussy and boyscout. I did an awful lot to improve myself as a person, yet I still get shit on. I always believed if you held yourself up to a higher standard people can learn from your example and want to be better people from it. I go to college, I brought myself up from a rut I was stuck in and now I’m on my way to graduation, I bought a car, I have genuinely good friends and a girlfriend with goals and aspirations, yet people still call me a loser. I’m trying really hard to not lose it. Put the semester first, everything else comes later.

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Remembering the year that you were gone
A series of decisions
Unhealthy living
Writing novels in monitored time

Cold pavement under static sky
Gaining patience, but losing sight
We wrote off our problems as better times

But hey, you couldn’t sell the stories anyway
But hey, you couldn’t sell the stories anyway

In a battle with New England of who knows you best
A mediocre vote of confidence
That poor boy won’t know what hit him
If and when you tell commitment to take a hike
It’s the same old story, so help me if I try
To make an honest effort this time

But hey, you couldn’t tell the stories anyway
But hey, we couldn’t tell the stories anyway
But hey, we couldn’t sell the stories anyway

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Starting the new year by taking out some of the negatives in my life. I unfriended the most condescending, hateful and angry person I know. I call him out on something stupid once and now were on bad terms. Just like that. I’m happy I got to meet my favorite band because of him but it’s hard for me to feel compassion for someone who sits behind a computer and says shit like “9/11 was an inside job” and “omg shut up about (insert recently dead celebrity here) go kill yourself you dumb fucking fuck”. Being compassionate for an actor who makes movies people enjoy is such a scumbag thing to do now days, or anyone relevant or important at the time. So fucking hardcore until he breaks up with his hoodrat girlfriend, then post sad song lyrics and shit, and get back with her after not 1, but 3 fucking times. Even after the whole world tells him “fuck that bitch, you deserve better”. And she’s fucking pregnant too, and she took the baby too? After she left you 3 times DOES IT REALLY FUCKING SURPRISE YOU??? Truth is I wish him the best with everything, I tried the best i could to be a friend, I have nothing to apologize for. If I see him again I bro nod and move on with my life. I don’t hate him, I don’t hate anybody, but he’s not someone I need in my life right now. And I honestly hope he has good things coming to him. Lord knows he needs it more than anything.

Second-whether I find a job soon or not I’m quitting my job. I want to focus on school, but I also need money. I can bounce back, I know what I’m capable of and I can do tasks that are asked. I can find something better. I can compare my work relationship to a shitty girlfriend. Treats me like shit, but I could have it better somewhere else. So now time to start looking for new work.

I’m gonna be more healthy with myself. I’ve ate so much I feel like I might die of a heart attack by the time I’m 30. Dying young is not what I want to do. I’m also gonna start telling myself I can. And nothing is impossible. I’m gonna make serious moves, and serious choices. I’m gonna make this year count.

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You should be worried.

Eugene hangs himself - The Sopranos HD - YouTube